living it thru

WELCOME...

to adulthood. to priorities & priotitizing. to choices. right & wrong could determine your life.

WELCOME...

to not having anyone telling you what to do, except for the ones who has some type of input on how yur gonna get rent paid; ergo your managers. to being too tired to go out because you have jus wrkd a 12 hr shift. to LiFE.

i noticed yesterday that adulthood consists of trial after each tribulation. if you dnt deserve a moment in life where everything seems to be going GRRREAT, then trust & believe you will not receive one.

if you show appreciation & give yurself props for accomplishing little shit & being thankful for being alive, once you sit dwn & actually evaluate yur situation, you will see yur actually doin pretty good for yurself.

you cant help but love it. the freedom, the tests, the adrenaline rush of not knowing if the choice yur making is gonna kick you lower into the slums or the pleasure of enjoying the outcome if you make the correct decision.

i cant speak for everyone but i know im greatly appreciative of being alive, appreciative of the tests & everything im put through on a day to day basis. i kno its jus getting me ready for something bigger & .making me stronger.

yes, i wish i was ensconced by my family & friends whom i trust with my decisions, but im not & its a great feeling.

now onto those whom are a part of this adulthood but are not acting the part. yur not doing anything but making things more difficult for yourself. the weak ass job yur wrking that isn't enuff to bring to whomevers table yur eating at, lying & being deceitful, putting on facads because you feel as though you wont be accepted but getting figured out, etc. etc.
most likely you are the ones hating life, wishing wishing wishing, seein no outcome, & wondering why.
you have to accept the fact that you don't have a better job, accept the fact that nothing seems to be going your way. NOTHING in life is free. NOTHING.

anything you want or even wish for, you have to work for it. expecting too much or too little is jus more pressure to endure on yur behalf. if you think yur wrkn hard & getting no outcome, work harder. no such thing as wrkn TOO hard when you have to take care of yurself.

what are you doing exactly?
maybe you need to find another approach?
are you approaching the correct situations?

ask yurself theez things, see what yur doing right & what yur doing wrong, change things.

its all a struggling process we have to go thru. so dnt look dwn on everything & dnt make everything out to be a problem or like its done to you.

you are put thru everything for a reason & its done for you, not to you.

WElCOME.

PEACe &l O Ve

chek this out

MTV Shows

writers block

itsz like having a hand cold & a brain fart all at once.
great ideas but no idea for beginnings or endings.

how do you rid yourself of this horrid disease ?
is there even a cure ?

i have tried random writings to see if a flow will erect in my time of need. NOPE.

i ride the friggin train in ATL every friggin day. itsz always sumthing to blog about but my hands wont let me. its killing me. tormenting me.

i havent watched too much tv kuz i have yet to get to that part of progress in my crib.
so as far as entertainment, imLOST, left behind, in the clouds, clueless.

i do have magazines tho. i have yet to find a COMPLEX mag in my area, which i think is a sign for me to get a subscriprion.
i jus subscribed to PAPER mag like a few weeks ago & still havent received a conformation or nuthin, so i think i need to look into that.

i need to get out some more as well. i think if im on the scene i will be more up on what's the HAPPENING.

well hopefully i get over this friggin sickness & can give you guys something good for this wknd.

one idea i do have is to revamp my whoooole blog. make it more relevent.
so stay tuned & bare with me guys. i got you. i promise.

as for right now ....

"I AM SOMEBODY
I CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE
I AM RESPOSIBLE FOR MY BEHAVIOR
I AM SOMBODY."
MISS. JERIDEAU
5TH GRADE TEACHER.

i just thought about this & how true it is.

we have so many people blaming others for THEIR lives.

"its the white man thats keepin us down"
"my parents weren't there for me"

when in all actuality its you that's keepin you down.
its you that's not believing in yourself.

its like your self esteem.

KAT WILLIAMS said it best.
" how the fuck can you let someone mess up yur self esteem? its esteem of yo self."

your parents not being there for you,
that was their job.

if tey didnt do it then you do for you
what they should have done.

make it right, make it work,
make it happen.

or.....
DONT.

crashconomy 101

so, wut you do is, fake a severe heart attack after you having pumped yur gas.
not sure what signs a heart attack intels but you wont have to pay for gas.

thats evidently what the economy is coming to.

let me fill you in, jus in case you havent heard about the guy who faked a heart attack at a restaurant to avoid paying a $23 bill.

i wonder how the waitress reacted.?
just imagine.

"uh uh nigga, you better fall all over the fckng floor after you gimme my damm TIP!" while reaching for his pockets. LoL !

well, it was a good try i guess.

now he has a 10K fine to pay & faces up to 9 mnths behind bars where they do NOT serve $23 meals.

fortunately, they dnt ask for tips either.

poor guy. all because he prolly wanted to put that damm $23 in his gas tank to get home.
which by the way was prolly bout 5 minutes away. LoL !

i prolly woulda tried sumthin similar so i wnt even pass judgement, especially with the places that actually have gas here in GA, the prices are reDUNKulous.
QT is $4.10 a gal.
BP is $4.50 a gal.

WTF?!
and they have the nerve to wonder why people are faking heart attacks & fighting on 3 hour lines waiting for some dam gas.

jus imagine being in your car alone for 3 hours waiting to spend your last 20 on 4 gallons of gas. can you imagine the anger & frustration in that little scenerio ?

i have seen a gas attendant get his life threatened, a man and a woman fighting [fist fighting btw] because the man cut the woman in line, and i have waited in a line for 3 hours to be the next to pump gas & the person right in front gets the last bit of gas.

talk about being peeved.

we are in a time that most definetly is going in the HISTORY books.

so much wrong & not enough right to cover up some of the wrong.

lets all just vote OBAMA.


p.s. - i jus realized how much i like STRIPEs.

GAS

i wonder if after this situation with the economy is over, will people continue to take these commodities for granted.

can you imagine how the countries who are used to a limited supply of such a necessity to us feels now?

the places who have to live w/o water, electricity; GAS, the things we have taken for granted for so long & have unlimited amounts to waste, others cherich the small amounts they have.

WE HAVE NO GAS !

that means everything that runs off gas can either fall out of existance or become so expensive that we are unable to afford them!

lawn mowers, scooters, motor cycles, or most importantly CARS.
what about airplanes, buses, trains, or even more important, our homes.

just imagine how hectic & insane public transportation would be.
what about food?

this can cause a riot. desperate times leads to desperate measures.

gas stations are packed beyond capacity, some are even limiting you to a certain amount of gas. some are even out.

HOW in the hell are we out of gas ?

duece duece w/ da aces

well monday the 15th is THE official day but celebration started friday on my lonesome.

- a lil shoppin @ HENNES & MAURTIZ
- IKEA for the new casa.
- PEACE chain & bracelet 4rm lil market
- blew mother erff w/ da co worker =)

a pretty good start for the main event to have been 2 days away.

saturday mornin i was waken up by
" wake up brooo wake uuuuup!" repeatedly mind you.

- 2001 nails where i was pampered w/ a pedicure, manicure, & sum wax shit on my feet & hands. da scrubbin part on the pedicure didnt tickle as much as i thought it would have but it still tickled like hell.
the lady who was tending to my feets was funny as hell but spoke really fckd up [engRish] LoL !
- b.domenic massage therapist put me to sleep. OMFG my first friggin full body massage was out of this WOOORLD !
thnx broskie.
- STRIP for feast and fun.
russy got us a round of shots of patron.
we ate sushi, pasta, & bunch of other shite.
alone once again -
STROKERS by my lonesome kuz the homies had to wrk this a.m.
but whaaaaat! a nigga had a friggin ball all alone.
2 bday lap dances and sum cheap ass long islands that had me trashd !

sunday [today] expectations were to chill & jus have sum relaxation time but wrk inter fckn feard.
oh well priority b4 poorty =!

so im gettin offa wrk. gonna go blaze mother erff & take it dwn & continue bein blessed.

i L0VE my acessss !

oh & the rest. peace.

hey yall.
i was jus wondering...
spring time calls for necessaties.

what do you need to survive this spring ?
do you need fashion, tv, music ?

better get with it, because spring is evanescent.
some ppl dunno that.

sync yur ipods w/ janelle monae, andre 3000, weezy, matisyahu, the ting tings, the veronicas,
madonna, and some of yur choices.

fill yur closets w/ cardigans, vneck pull over vests, converses, skinnys, boot cuts, loose fits, slim fits, and some of your choices.

tune your television & mark yur calenders this mnth kuz we have GOSSIP GIRLS, politics (LoL !), entourage, true blood, 6 feet under. oh and some of your choices of course.

but hey look. this is jus a warm up. did you like the last one ?

a wrd of advice

"take a step and make it worth it.
persistance helps, aint nobody perfect."
xmister.jacksonx 9.10.oh8

when yur faced with difficult trials throughout life, itsz only to strengthen you. never give up.

look back but dnt dwell & learn from your mistakes.
know that if you didnt learn the first time and you feel liek "why duz this shit keep happening to me?" itsz BKUZ you didnt learn the first time.
take those experiences as they are.

dont allow yourself to be blinded.

take chances and risks.
think outside the box.
challenge yurself.
make goals.
write down dreams.
live your life.

make sure you count on yurself and that anything you ask from someone else yur able to provide for yurself.

maintain a focus and straighten priorities.
keep an agenda.
check off each completed task & MAKE SURE you give yurself credit for accomplishments.

teach yourself new things.
expand your vocabulary.
get a hobby.

always keep in mind that you can be 10x worse.

itsz never too late.
TOO LATE is a state of mind.
[a negative state at that]

broaden horizons.
talk to ppl.

get feedback.
ask question.
[no qustion is a dumm question unless unasked.]

P.S. HAPPY BIRTHDAY POP POP.
R.i.P. 0L' head i love & miss you liek crazy.

sprung on springin

layers layers layerrrrs.

v neck sweaters w/argyle patterns
on top of contrasted color button ups.

olive & chocolate color corduroys &
wool ties. yummm.

zip up knitted cardigans &
long sleeve henleys.

down vests & wallabees.
peacoats & plaids.

aaaaaaah itsz coming.

this is the time guys.
catch me if you can.

springin into spring.
gettin ready.

on yur marks. get set.

hot names for the fames.

elie tahari [everythingggg]
c.p company [dope ass coats & materials]
john varvatos [for converses]
etro [for the open minded]

& some for you

GAP
banana republic
lacoste
H&M
DKNY
ralph lauren

well das all for now.
that felt gooood.

skin crawler

your voice makes me wanna climb on top of a building and jump while slicing my wrists with a bottle i jus broke over my head.

seein yur face makes me feel violent & wanna lye in bed with a bottle of asprin pill poppin drinkin hennesey til i lye there dead.

i allow you to piss me off
when i should jus pop off

you say lil smart shit to test my patience
but you dont kno me kuz I roll liek them hatians

you kno what i mean so dont act cluleszz

i will thrash you and smash you
choke you and de throat you

break your fingers and lissen as yur scream lingers

it will bring me joy kuz boy oh boy

you make my skin crawl.

when you walk i wanna tie a rope roun my neck and jump from the second floor of our restaurant with an 'I HATE YOU' sign taped to my shirt.

when you smile it makes me wanna crack my teeth with a hammer while sewing my eyelids closed to blind my view and keep in the dirt.

i will slice you and dice you
set fires and burn you

scold you and mold yur ashes
into a pair of ass cheeks and
sit you in the middle of times square.

bkuz you make my skin crawl.

sooner or later im gonna react quickly
make sure you dnt forget me

imma slap punch punch punch punch
mush

then drop kick you into a bush

imma stand you up and punch punch punch
kick yur head into a wall

and when you fall

imma face yur mouth to the curb and stomp the back of yur head and split yur cheek bones.

uuuuughk. [clinching fists]

kuz you make my fckn skin crawl !

blakk monday

well today is the day. [deep breathe]

my sister is procrastinatin like a em effa.
sum of the family sittin in the livin room
and some are already at the church.

thiss shit is hard. i feel like no even going.
i kno thats not gonna NOT happen though.

they are re capping old memories and im
trynna slide off into tune wrld.

i can feel the "lengthyness" of this day.
my belly hurts, i have NO enery, my legs
are weak, i cant seem to focus.

i jus want it to be over.
& they want me to deal with sum more ppl
for like some re pass or sum shit & then
go to my aunts house to deal with more shit.
im liek man FUKK A DINNER & the shit that comes with it.

well time to go. uuuuuughk !

I DONT WANNA =(

story of the aces.

i wonder if people really understand that you only get one chance.
like even the people who believe in reincarnation.
like if you are reborn as a tree, you are not gonna be that tree like "omg, i was here before. i was here before as a person. i remember my name & everything." R O F LMOA !

life comes at you with a question asking, "HOW ARE YOU GONNA HANDLE ME?" and asks only once.

iknow im not on my grind 1oo percent.
but i know i can do it. and quick.

the niggaz wiff no jobs and aint lookin for one and isnt expectin one, i DO NOT see how that is possible.

the world has entirely too much to offer for you to not want anything at all!

my g.pops, g.ma, &aunty lived long lives and made sure they lived to the fullest.
i have this picture with my g.ma passed out with her head in my pop pops croch.
R O F L M A O !!

i think aunty was da lil uiet one. idunno if t was bkuz she was older and errbody was on sum new shit, or if it was because she knew some shit but was the older sister and jus let shit ride.

yo my gramz went home kinda loud ya kno? but aunty jus went to sleep peacefully.

now g.pops was kinda informatively hard. i hadnt seen him in forever. i am the one whom carries his name though. HAMZA "CHARLES JACKSON". i had to hear bout his wellness instead of seeing it with my own eyes. even with opportunity.

i couldnt control myself. it seemed to jus keep coming back. as soon as i stepped foot in the house i broke down. didnt stop til the COOKOUT.

wha ? my g.pops made sure i ate. if he aint gimme nothin he made sure i ate. i wante done of those damm sticks though.

he carved these like barks of a tree into like walking sticks.
they had different shades and designs and shit.

i didnt know anyone else did that. until recently when i bumped into this lady that had one and i told her my grandfather used to make those. but let this had been when he was alive, i woulda jus asked her when he made it.

i hope this isnt too much for you guys because this reeeeeally feels gooooood. like a deep breathe of fresh ass air. ughk. ::sniffingggggggg:: LOL!

that sounded like such a coke head type line. it wasnt though. lissen to this, "i do not approve that message."

R O F L M A O!

isnt HILL C. crazy as hell fa dat ?
i mean come on. are you serious ?

we have come to the conclusion [pause]
[long..uncomfortavle......pause]

"HILARY CLINTON, is an alien."
[gasps] ::gassssssps:: for air.

okay. STAY TUNED.......

hard knock life

itsz hard to deal with so much shit at once. itsz even harder to find ways to try & put things in order to deal with them so you wont become a nut case.

ever had a person you jus dislike so much that evry little thing they do bothers you?

itsz this guy at my job whos walk & voice bugs the shit outta me bkuz i have grown to dislike him so much.

seein his sleeves rolled up on his shirt when they arent usually makes me feel violent.

sounds liek i need help huh ?
well at this point in my life i think i do need sum type of help. i jus dunno where to get it from.

im usually the one giving the pats on the bakk sayin errthing is gonna be ite but when itsz my turn i have no one to turn to but my pen & pad & i seem to never get arespomse so in all actuality the shit is still a problem.

bad "relationships" , fckd up living situations , fckd up credit , death , life , life, and life.

to love such a thing could only mean insanity.

living everyday pushin problem after problem to the side until the nxt one arrives doesnt seem to do the job.
but at the end of the day life goes on and leaves no room for giving up.

so i gess that means i jus gotta suck this shit up & move on.

lessons are so easily learned but they seem to go unnoticed until sumthing even worse happens.

i say live evryday like itsz yur last & make the best of it.

life is all about choices but death is sumthing thatsz yet to be able to be controlled.

i dnt see how we have the power to control lites & even other ppls minds but we cant control losing.

contridictive sounding but it feels so true.

they say music soothes the savage beast so off i go into a wrld of tunes to relieve my inner beast. wish me luck.

xmister. jacksonx

back 2 black

this lost jus shows how yur here one day & gone the nxt.
jus lost my g.pops last month & this month my g.ma & her sis followed him home.
its weird kuz they all played extremely large parts in my life & now they're gone.
i guess now they can really keep an eye on me so i can show them what i can do.
show them the time they put into producing such a product wasnt a waste of time.
i know they are in the heavens relaxin & prolly catchin up & havin drinks.
may their souls rest peacefully & know the family will be takin care of.

with much love
R.i.P ol' heads.

she...

turns heads & breaks necks
shake hands & makes fans.

has THE sexiest lips
fine ass hips
brains for daze
makes me gaze...

into her words which rubs me liek a mother
does her baby
reaching zones unreachable & sumtimes
drive me crazy

wish i could touch & kiss
and hug her body like.. this

i would cook & clean kuz her body is MEAN
make a nigga wanna act up til my insides erupt.

but so far we're gone but imma keep holdin on...

til i reach her
i wont deter

i will breathe her
until i see her

i will make her smile
kuz it drives me wild

Tiairra L is the name
blogging is her game

she is his fist
and he certaintly cant resist

she... =)

quikk OBAMAtics

first off is this damm fist bump thing. known to the upperclassmen as a " scripted display of affection". from HILLARY CLINTON p.o.v. it was a terroristic
display. anything to deter the people away from the obvious of OBAMA gripping this election tighter and tighter everyday eh CLINTON?




OBAMA has an appetite for more than just this election. MAYBE it was the munchies? MICHELLE back there like, "well damm, if they didnt know they know now." LMAO!




if you cant beat em' then join em'. CLINTON & OBAMA is holding a joint fundraiser in NY. she knows she has no chance so she decides to try and secretly raise money with "THE MAN" to maybe get her back in the running ? hmph.



HE HAS MY VOTE !

imitation is SUICIDE [pt 2/response]

okay, so wutsz yur definition of originality ?

WEBSTER says originality is the quality or state of being original.
which if i may add, is pretty broad.

DICTIONARY.com says originality is the ability to think or express oneself in an independent and individual manner; creative ability.
which might i add, is also pretty broad.

myspace.com/sonofrahim [thats me] defines originality as one whom has inspirations, can visually or verbally reiterate a thought or idea and come up with something new.

now how do yu like those apples ? ["stolen" phrase] does that make me a poser, biggot, copy cat ?

ORIGINALITY is more than jus a word, its a way of life such as peace & love.

90 percent [my statistics] of the ideas snc |GOD knows when| are all jus remakes of sumthing previous. ORIGINALITY does not come easy. and when it does, if yu pay close enuff attention, its always jus a remake or mockery of sumthing else.

the "NEW" trend of the 8o's.
that whole statement is contradicting but TRUE.

its become a part of the multi trillion dollar industry of FASHION.
its ran its way thru designers, and stylist, and models whom all
THOUGHT they were jus being ORIGINAL.

but it takes more than jus changing the color & fabric of sumthing to be
ORIGINAL.

who actually labels who is ORIGINAL and who isnt ?
i think its a mental thing personally.

WE are all ORIGINAL in our minds.

we get dressed to have a night out on the town and
wutever we decide to cover ourselves
with is a decision that we have made.

whether it be facade or a pair of bell bottoms.
its a reflection of who we are.

or should i speak for myself here?
because i know my style is jus a reflection
of who i am.

i like to think outside the box. but its easier sed than done.
once yu have become comfortable with something its hard
to mutate that thought into something else.

we will never run out of stages for aspiring models,
singers, actresses, etc etc. because everyone has
something that differentiates them from whom they
are being compared to.

why?







[*my thoughts*]

because WE are all DIFFERNT- whisper --- original.

sunnybunny ---- xoxoxoxo. stay tuned.